This is going to be short because it's my morning cup of tea and I need to go have a shower etc.
I'm turning over another new leaf. I plucked up the courage to get prescription skin cream (ikr, but I'm retarded and hate doctors), I'm not going to try as hard and hope everything just tumbles and lands together like a jigsaw.

I'm thankful that...
My parent's aren't divorced,
I've got two best friends who I adore...
(But I don't think they understand it.)
My back is fixed.
I'm intelligent.
I'm single.
I am myself, and only that.
I make mistakes.

I want to just say something before I sign out.
Everybody is equal.
I heard a conversation yesterday between two people.
PS. I don't care what they think of me.
Anyway, they were talking about someone who occasionally thinks
she's better than other people.
And one of the people talking stated that it was with due reason.
And the other nodded.
No. No. No. No.
Nobody is better than anyone else. We all make the same mistakes.
We're all the same race. No matter if you're annoying,
socially retarded, bad-mannered, conceited, depressed, overly cynical....
We're all the same. Human. And no matter what you think...
No matter how far your head is up your ass and how much better you think
you are then everyone else...
You're just the same as the person your criticizing.


And I wish I had realized it sooner.
Lucy
xx
Comment.

TimeSurge - great posts, all the time.

Toast with golden syrup...

Brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack...







Stop with this monotoneeee. Feels like liquid life is rolling off my back. I wish I could live hard and fast... Pull these stupid metal torture devices off with pliers, get suspended, drink, smoke and snort like a rockstar, totter around in 6 inches everyday. Fuck in ditches, have boys trailing at my feet. Ash blonde dye with bright pink coon-tails. I want to be bright-bold-beautiful... but I'm left as Lucy Bennett. The 14 year old with braces and bad skin and no excessive prettyness in any form and an expanding waistband and no tits and no boyfriend. And I'm a waste of space... my parents say it enough and everyone else acts like it. My house is my cage.. I'm just a bird with clipped wings. I feel like I don't get to explore.. I feel trapped and secluded and stupid. I want out.



Today, today, today. Some hot blonde milf came to check out the house to rent. We cleaned 'til 3. Doctors appointment at 5.30. So I went out anyway. Me, Missa & Ash trailed after some people and then got bored and pulled a 'toilet break' at her house for tea and fuddzz. Mmm, golden syrup on toast. And we played 'Do, Date, Dump' and Truth because we know Ashling only ducks into the Dare option. For any inquisitive young people, No, Ashling doesn't poke herself, which we discovered in truth. (Y). It rained today. Surprise, fuckkingg surprise. I was reading Time;Surge and it was about rain and it was lovely. There's something therapeutic about rain. Only when you're indoors listening and watching though. Outside it's just annoying, when eyeliner dribbles and that white t-shirt you wore reaallllly wasn't such a great idea. But indoors, it's like toddlers dancing on your roof, like watching a thousand glittering fairies dance and drop, dance and drop. 3 hour doctor wait... Just for acne cream. There were these two adorable korean kids and that brightened the trip.



I really miss my camera. It's like a horcrux. Like someone destroyed part of my soul. PS. That sounded 18x better before I typed it. On those rare occasions that I look nice, I like to capture it and display it. Oh, and those beautiful gradient pink-orange-indigo sunsets that are so ethereal. Keyword is bracelet. I had to go and fuck up and break it, right? Laptop screen, broken. Phone, broken. Camera, broken. iPod, lost. I try so hard to be careful and graceful but damn, is that a fail. And I'm clumsy. I fall and trip all the time. I thought nobody noticed, but then people started describing me as 'the clumsy blonde' so... I obviously wasn't as inconspicuous as I'd previously wished and assumed.





Hardly any comments. Just Georgia & Vic again. ILY guys. You always comment. It keeps me blogging when you guys comment. It turns on my light-bulb of hope and creativity.
I'mma go now because I'm tired and need tea to give myself envigorating bounce etc.
Addicted to Kesha's Tik-Tok.

LUCY
XX
COMMENT

Take Me Out...

My period leaked all over my favourite Hilfiger jeans. The only denim blue jeans I have. Skinny fit, ass-clinging beauty-of-a-pair-of-jeans. I adore them. I am praying that Mother Nature's scarlet flowing tides is no match for Vanish Oxi Action.

Bank Holiday Weekend Midterm Start.. (Y). T'was pretty damn awesome. Saturday, me and Missa wandered and got lost in forest and then met up with peeps etc. I think I said that last post. Anyway, Sunday... Oh yes, Missa slept over. Watched One Missed Call. Fucking freaky shit, Missa wasn't affected, she is totally horror-tolerant. I was terrified. Naturally. She snores like a hoover. She is too too funny though. Wrote a rap about George the Nigger. Danced to 'I've got a little puppy' by The Smurfs. Oh, the fun. Todayyy, we had separate showers, dried our hair, did our make-upsss. Then I went back Missa's place and waaaaalkkeedddd to call for Ash. We looked mad 80s, me and Missa, cus we both curled our hair and had these whopper bows and leather jackets and illuminous shit. We were ballin' loike. I'm mad hyper. Because I ate like a harse. White chocolate, sour jawbreakers, that sugar-filled over-advertised sour spray thingymabob, salt and vinegar twists. I feel fat as fuck. But I was mad hyper. To the extent that Dannysaurus Rex actually asked if I was drunk. Ste had whiskey though, I fink, but I wasn't going to risk groundation over the mid-term for a swig. And then I basically hip-hop-super-moshed to Taylor Swift and Busted and MJ. And me and Missa did our 'I've gotta little puppy' dance again. Complete with loud refrains of 'POOPAAAA, POOPA SCOOPA'. We really oughta get our heads checked.

I felt so ugly today, and fat and unwanted. I felt like everyone's always staring me down, like the disobedient young child who is always misbehaving... the ugly misfit. And the whole dramarama doesn't help. Dividing the group is just pointless... It's not like it's going to help anything. It's not like it's going to magically work. I apologized. She just didn't accept it. I know so much that I went way too far out of line. And I understand why. But I wish I never said it, I wish I could shut my mouth, I wish I wasn't such a fuck up. I always wonder how the people I know... how their lives would play out if I never existed. If I wasn't ever there or if I vanished. I always think people would be happier. People seem sad when I'm near. Like I drag grey rain clouds above me on a string like helium balloons. I don't know. Epic fail.

I'mma go.

I don't feel like dancing.

LUCY

COMMENT

XX

Repulse me with your lack of satisfaction...

But I turn him on, and he comes to life...

I have never read Hamlet. I don't know if it's on the senior cycle curriculum, but I think it is. But over the past couple of weeks, I've been familiarizing myself with Ophelia, the young woman in love with Hamlet. He original shows her love back, but he begins to ignore her and reject her, and finally humiliate her. And she was so heartbroken she drowned herself, whilst singing love songs and entwining flowers into her hair. The painting is by Alexandre Canabel, and Shakespeare himself wrote the passage in which she dies colourfully and beautifully....

"There is a willow grows aslant the brook,
That shows his hoar leaves in the glassy stream;
There with fantastic garlands did she come.
Of crow-flowers, nettles, daisies, and long purples.
There on the pendant boughs her coronet weeds
Clambering to hang an envious sliver broke.
When down the weedy trophies and herself
Fell in the weeping brook."

I don't know why I'm so captured by the tale... I think it's just so sad. Men, eh? Grrr. Now I'm angry at men over fiction. Boys too. I'm so peculiar. I'm in my early teens, yet when I'm single I want to be held, and when I have somebody, I'm mostly uncomfortable. The people I'm actually comfortable with break up with me. This year I've felt like such a failure in the boyfriend thing. Ash will go 'No, I'm worst than you' but she isn't because boys do want her she just doesn't put herself out there in that sense. Longest relationship for me: 2 weeks 3 days. That's an epic fail. I broke up with 3 because I was uncomfortable.... and those were the two-week ones. And then 4 broke up with me, some in a lot less than a week. I thought I was okay about it by now. I thought I was over it. But I feel kind of threadbare. Empty. Only 70 years to go.


Youth Club was almost as bad as the gaa. At least I knew people at youth club. My little case of the snifflez and coffz is now a big case of the snifflez, coffz && sneeezez. But I'm not sick. Teehee. Sleepover with Missa tonight. I feel like an eleven year old. I'm mad excited too. I haven't had a sleepover since well before the operation. Ash was s'posed to come but she's babysitting. Roll on 2k10 bbz. Winter = hatred. I can't even get xmas presents this year 'cus we're poor. So basically, I just want it all to be over with, the unnecessary snifflez & the bad weather.


Pretty pearls mommy bought me..... broke mysteriously snapped in the key word is banana middle of the night all by themselves. Still not doing anything for Halloween. And it's my favourite time of year. This year was effing great. (:

Nothing else to write. Life is boring, monotonous, boringly monotonous and monotonously boring.....


LUCY
XX
COMMENT

Smile, you're on camera...

History is written by the winners...





Look at that belt. I want, I want, I want. I re-discovered my inner fashion-obsessed girly girl at 4am when I had sudden coughing fit and woke up. Naturally, at 4am I a) could not make noise && b) was extremely bored. So, flick flick flick, I searched my bookshelf 'til I found that Rachel Zoe chick's guide to style. I was like OMG lulz this is going to be over-indulgent, materialistic shit. But it wasn't. So I made myself a list of things to make me stylish again. It went like:

• Red lipstick
• Black liquid eyeliner
• Scarf
• Plain denim stone-washed skinnies
• Chanel inspired items
• Go to Designer Swap Shop
• Pearls
• Woolly hat
• Patent pumps/heels
• Cardigan
• Save up for Top Shop splash

Unknowingly, my mother totally contributed so I crossed out what she got.
Lovely style reformation day.

Going to go blonder too. Blonde, understated-fashionista type Lucy is coming soon to a theater near you....

Non-uniform day tomorrow. Was going to dress up for Halloween but nobody else is and I'd walk in as scary zombie and they'd lul so hard they'd piss on their plastic chairs. Now, I'mma wear my brand new stripey cardigan, my denim mini-skirt, nude tights, pearls, tartan converse (gives me le grande clashingness/originality). Today's keyword is plaque. I'm hoping that everyone won't laugh and go zOMG thighs. YC tomorrow. Hardly anyone's going. Cept' Missa Mushroom and Efaa.

Cillian's blog = bastardly piece of shit. He goes on for two paragraphs about Sarah and how, to put it in simpler terms, she is the spawn of the devil. Sarah Morrin is one of the nicest, prettiest girls I've met in my entire life. And Cillian, he totally screwed her over, whether he denies it or not. Fucking someone and then asking their best friend out...? That's soooo not screwing her over. And then he goes on about people bitching about people on their blogs, instead of saying it to their face, in a later post. And he spelt cynic wrong. His piece of total shit.

And I know, I'm being hypocritical by bitching at him on my blog. But blog-to-blog combat is perfectly fine in my head. :D



I'mma love you and leave you.
Comment=Twitter=Smile
Lucy
xx

Pentacles and polyjuice potions...

I kissed a boy, just to start shit...








Welcomeee.
'Nother doss week in school. Yesterday was an ecology trip, which was me trekking, panting, trekking, panting and searching for bugs. I mean, walk down the hill = funzies. Walk back up it... diezies. On the plus side, the bus back to school was mighty awesomesauce. Cheryl Cole singalongs ftw. Today, we were off at 12.40. Sooo basically, I only had maffs, assembly fingy, geoggers, francais annnndddd irish. GUESS WHAT? Major swine flu outbreak. 202 people were out sick yesterday. Out of 700 students. D: Like, ffs. SHUT DOWN THE SCHOOl. One of the teachers has it. Emma has it. Shout out to that loveelly girly. She had to listen to my amazing singing on the bus... may God bless her. Piles of business h/w due Thursday from last Friday. I hope Ms. Plunkett gets it. Does morbid obesity make you high-death-risk? And she's too fat to get to a doctors too. Yesssssssss. Witch!lucy escaped to, loike, bid bad wishes to that rotund lady. If you're reading this Ms. Plunkett, I am greatly sorry and do not mean to insult you... kinda.



Everyone's blogging. Grr. I bring it up every second post, but helloooo, I started it. All hail Lucy, queen of North Kildare Region Blogger Pages. 'Cus my blog has effort and almost-daily-posts and a real mofoing template instead of a crappy preset or some tacky twilight one or cupcake one. Sigh. Wan's blog is purdy cool. I need to link more people too. Please note; If you want to be linked, you gotta comment for a while. You can't just show up, go straight to my c-box and be laik 'HAI GIMME LINKZEZ'. BTW, that actually wasn't pointed towards you, Naddie, but if you're doing what I said you won't even know. O.o heyyy, I have a preventative method. Keywords. I'll give y'all a keyword to put in the c-box if you read the latest post. Today's keyword is areola. Yes, that is a part of your nipple, for you twerds who don't know but sense that an awesome word like that must be related to boobage in some way.



Slootpocalypse Halloween is gonna suck for me this year. Can't go Ste's party which some young ladies will be delighted by. Actually, boys too. Basically, everyone. And everyone who isn't going is previously engaged w/ trick or treating and shit (which I agree with, for free sweety reasons). I'll probably sit at home alone and spend my time on Caféworld and updating my blog header. Maybe rent out Teeth. Alone. Nothing better than a night alone with vagina dentata. Msn me if your would like to join me :( .. That made for awkward sad-ass moment. Shout out to Nicky Graydon because he is first class nerdtacular. Ehmm... oh yes, 5 comments: Vic, Missa, Naddie, Lulu and Sarah so luvvage to them. I was like SMILEYSMILEYLOVED for an hour. I'm a sad, sad girl.



Ba da da daaaa *finds rad pics for this post on Google* .....










Leaving you with this sexy cover of Britney's new song, 3, about uhmm... a threesome. I fink these guys are better. ;)



LUCY
XOxO

Hugs aren't over-rated....

Mirror, mirror on the wall...

Well, hello thereee. Haven't blogged in a while. No comments loike. Faaaiill.

I've put my bloggedy blog on loads of those blog directory thingies but to no avail. The magick drags down like un anchor. Teeheehee. Lucy didn't go out yesterday, because Ash and Missa weren't going out and I would've been stuck with people who hate me which... isn't my ideal backdrop tbh. Went to the disco.. *finger lifty dance nerd thing*. It sucked like a Dyson. Me and Ash knew like nobody so we trailed around after Lowa and Fiona like STDs and tried to take pictures of them and random fellas swapping spit. I met 5 people. Which is an All Time Low (I got your pictuuuureeee..) for me. 5 ugly fellas, dare I say it. I really don't want to go. I looked horrible and over-dressed and ew braces and the place was sweaty and gross and most of the third years were locked and the rest were just first years. Some phitty was grinding on Fiona and this gorgeeeyyyy boy was chatting Ailbhe up and I was like waddafuck whydoibother because Ailbhe the recluse pulled and LUCY DIDNT. Thank you, Mr. Gene Pool, bad teeth, and tempting fatty foods.

X -Factorrrrr. I'm totally xdicted. I was like OOH JOHNANDEDWARD who I used to hate but have grown oddly fond of which is truly peculiar. Still fap to adore Danyel Johnson. Mmm Mmm Mmm. Big fucking whoop that he's bi, y'all should be thankful that he shares and cares. Look at that: (fap fap fap)

[I seriously think I came]

Todayyysss, I'm wearing my purdy denim skirt and my black H&M plaity-bordered, floaty top thing. And my racy-lacy penneys tights. Gotta love de Primark. I do truly adore these tights. They're so sexual. My skin is really crap lately. I have these two spots right on the border of my upper lip, directly symmetrical to each other like some gay type of angelbites. I need to get healthy but the aldi brand junk food always screams my name. I need more food willpower. But none of that. I need a cigarette also. Might bum some today or dip into my savings. Trouble with owning my own pack of cigs is that I'd get caught so dang easy. I always act suspicious. Like the day I sneaked to town, I came home all James Bond. My ma went 'Want some gum?' in the car on the way home and I was like 'What? No! What are you saying? I'm a good girl!'. Fail Lucy is fail; Danny hasn't blogged in yeaurs. Little whorebag. Not really, btw, in case people take it seriously and start off with those 'BLOGS JUST CAUSE FIGHTS *cry cry*' blog posts. Grr FU to you haterssssssssssss. <3

Paramore soon. And Halloween. Need to find cunning plan to go Ste's and smoke and lesbian sex. And I need to make my costume for school. And I need to dry my hair. HAHA.

There go my whole twenty euro year's savings. ;P

Lucy

xx

COMMENT

Abracablah.

Now I'm of consent and age....

Noticed something. Romance is the only thing that plagues my brain lately. T'is peculiar. Love seems to be temporary, illusory. And yet, I still fucking adore the concept. It's like the idea of afterlife... an anesthetic. Yet for some unknown reason, I want it. Even teenage love would do me. I just want the experience. I have never even passed those little twinkling 'I love you's that mean nothing. All I want for Christmas is an American import. ;)

Was reading Big Woo again. How much would it suck if my parents read my blog? I'd be grounded for years. I tell enough lies as it is. White lies that cling together like chewing gum fragments and make one big ball of chewing gum lies. Speaking of parents, daddy dearest is in Berlin and mumsy is in that disappointed mood. I swear, I could fail one test and she treats me like I got knocked up. 'zOMG I r so upset. U haz ruined churr liiiiiife' as phucking if.  Halloween dress up day in school is themed. 3rd years are Scooby Doo. FML. I'd prefer to be dressed as a Barbie. Clever Mia pointed out that Scooby has enemies. Teehee. So I'mma be a zombie. And I better win this year. -.-

Schoooool. 3rd year is utter stressstressstress. I wonder what I'l be like in leaving cert year, eh? Or when I'm a big grown up Lucy, giving birth. Ew. Scratch that. Note to self: Contraceptive pills & Adoption FTW. Tsk tsk to Teen Drama. Wishy washy shite, I dare say. None of us have real problems. We'll have problems later on, when we're unemployed and our parents die etc. I don't consider anything a problem. Stress, k. But not problems. PS: Leukemia kids, I am sorry, your problems are problems. Oh noes, I'm gonna cry now because people my age have leukemia. :(  Imagine having cancer during exam time. Shoccckkk horror.

I'mma go now. Comment, you cunts.

Only Vic commented last time. GAA tomorrow night.

Squeeee.

Hopefully, I won't be grounded. 

LUCY 

XX

Untitled post with a title.

Blah blah blaaawh.

Soz to the intarwebs for all the forgetful non-posting. This is gonna be short and sweet. Or somefing.

I hhhhaaaveeee given up with girly-fights. I'mma bitch if I please, but I'll refrain from being two-faced or deceiving or telling secrets. 'Cus that's a good friend. Gossshhh, people are just drowning me in their red flowing tides of PMT much. Faaaail. Studying. Grrawr. Life's all fuzzy like I forgot to put my glasses on. Hair is falling out, Lucy is migrainey and cannot sleep. EPIC FAIL.

I feel like I need to lose weight too. It's peculiar. =S

I need coffee and a cigarette atm. But I'mma settle for hot choccie and 2 panadols as courtesy of my mother. Was watching Aifric. She was being whiney like me about how boys never give her chances and everyone's in love etc. I was like OMGSHE'SJUSTMEWITHIRISHTALENTANDSUPERMODELGOODLOOKS. Aifric FTW.

Yikes yikes yikes.

@Keeva: I know what I've done wrong. And I know you don't think I do and that it's an unforgiveable offence &tc. I'm afraid of speaking to you on msn. So.. ehh... I feel like talking whatever out... In person loike. I don't know. I miss you though. *failface*

OWCH OWCH MIGRAINE.

NIGHTY NIGHTY Y'ALL.

Possible proper post soon.

Oohh Alliteration.

xx

I feel like a cold cup of tea...

You say it best... when you say nothing at all. 

Out of all my friends, I have been blogging the longest. 

Okay, I don't include Danny, because he blogged about laik... Singapore.

I have 47 followers and I blog for my own goddamn purpose. I truly am totally fed up at the people blaming fights on blogs. I've addressed it before, and I'll address it until people realize and shut the motherfuck up. Blogs do not cause fights. They just wimp up fights that would otherwise involve fists in real life. It's pathetic, whatever, we get it. I'm not blogging for you guys, I'm blogging for me and my international readers like the lovely Lulu and my cousin and Vic. Bottling things up leads for a reformation on someone, or an eruption of spite and anger and everything they ever hated about certain people. How can blogs be to blame? The people who write them are taking risks, as are the people who read them.. It's the people who cause the fights. It's damn childish to blame an imaginary floating segment on whatever's going on in your life. This isn't directed at Jonny or Keeva or Merissa...  It's directed at anyone who has ever blamed a blog for something that would've happened eventually; blog or no blog. This blog, ironically, isn't intended in starting a fight. If I weren't such a cowardly idiot, I'd say it to your faces. But I can't prevent the hundreds of trolls on the world wide web to their faces. 

Anywaaay, sorry about that long-winded rant. Needed to be said. Okay, I like to read other people's opinions on matters, and I respect them, so you gotta remember... this is just my opinion. When a person judges, it's their opinion. (: This week was doss in school. Still failing a lot. My parent's are all tense, tight, stressed. Over my schoolwork and the whole recessionary house sale. They keep saying 'the reason I do bad is because I make no effort'. Effort is trying, right? Or am I wrong. I was always under the impression that effort was attempting. I guess my parents want perfection. My sister rolls perfection around on her hand. I kind of... strive and fail. Fuck it, I love them, but when they say stuff like that or act that way, I always mumble '4 more years...'! Some crazzzyyyy halloween party was to ensue. But I got grounded. Which is just so unfair and Jem will be like 'Grounded or "Grounded"' and I'll be like GROUNDED. I was so warmed up to the idea, I was like BRING ON THE FEST. But then I had to go and say 'goodnight' sarcastically. I don't think I'll bother with going outside this weekend. No point in it.. dare I say. People hardly noticed I'm gone, and if they do, it doesn't stop them at all. XD They prefer the psychotic evil bitch staying at home, finishing knitting her red scarf and doing homework and reading Pride & Prejudice. I'm growing quite fond of the book. Especially Fitzwilliam Darcy. Mmmmmm. Stupid Lizzy is all ignorant of him. If such grandeur and mystery wafted around a boy today, I'd be on him like an opposite-poled magnet. 

I haven't blogged from an actual Mac for a whole year. Or so. I'm on the family computer/pieceacrap. Because my laptop broke. I can't even tell my parents because I broke my camera, lost my ipod, broke my phone, lost my mom's umbrella, broke my wall etc. They'd literally kill me. Or ground me for ages. Which I wouldn't mind. 

Well, au revoir, mon petit chou.

LUCY

XOXO

You've really made the gradeeee....

Ground Control To Major Tom....






Hello. Hello. HELLO.
Well, this is embarassing.
I was grounded, kay?
It's weird, for the whole time I was banned from the computer, I just felt like blogging. I guess my mind just hates me. Or Le Grande Kahuna. Wanna know what week it is? Friendship week. I heard that in the announcement during Maths and I just mumbled to myself: 'Oh the sweet, intoxicating irony.' That's why we are here... Some odd stage drama for a cynical bloke in the sky. 'I'll throw in 2 fights here, and hey presto, Civil War of friends.' Gr-reat.

Smile, goddamit, Lucy. I have decideeeed that I am not gonna let things get to me. So I'm going to ignore my problems. Or gain enough confidence to stand up and fight. I love this blog so much. It's unbelievable. It's like my birth child. When I stand back and admire this... work of monstrosity of some form.. I'm overwhelmed with pride and happiness at what I've written and how it got me out of depression (two blogs ago, before I had friends... basically, early last year) and the way it makes me feel (the way it maaaakes me feel, it really turnsss me onn). And having people read it and comment and follow makes me smile. Like wide grin that makes pieces of my inner-cheek catch on my braces. The smiles I keep for when I'm alone. Teehee.

I was reading Merissa's blog just there and she said she agreed with someone that blogs cause fights. I just felt like retaliating and supporting the blogging community because I absolutely disagree. A blog= a web log. A diary of some sort that one introduces to the worldwide web for entertainment or self purpose. A place to state your opinion. Blogs don't cause the fight; It's the people who don't want the truth who cause the fights. What? Do you player haters want us to lie just for your self esteem? Heaven knows that you probably have a hell of an ego as it is. Do we really have to fluff it? We have a right to state our opinions as human beings, just as you have a right to use that pointy white thing to move on up to the big red 'X' and click right out of this. To anyone who finks I'm a looner. YOU HAVE THE GODDAMN RED X RIGHT. If in doubt, click out. Remember RXR. Red X Right. It works on every blog on this server. (Y)



Pssh. Muvver is sha-houting. Apparently, when a sock is on the floor, I'm a bad person. Sigghhhh. House in le paper. It's as if as soon as we're losing the house, people ask more about it. Because that's what has been happening. AHA. We can bring the dog... That cheered me up. I'm worried for my mum. She's crying all the time. This house meant a lot to her.

COMMENT ME LITTLE CHICAS AND CHICOS AND SHIT. I'm working up this big topical blog. I know I've been a shitty blogger/writer/person lately. Stresssss. I guess. I'm kinda sick now too. :S


LUCY XOXO

Smashed panes cause smash pain.

I've always lived like this, keeping a comfortable distance...




Dudes. Aha. Things are just getting WORSE. I hate when that happens. Thanks for le comment support. It truly did help. Grounded for the weekend... from leaving the house, from seeing anyone, from using my phone, from using my laptop. I am breaking my parent's law by typing this but I'm just explaining. I don 't know. Friday in school, Ash was out, Jem seemed pissed and it was kind of awkward around Zoe and Katie and Fiona. They apologized to me, but of course, 6 months practically despising someone isn't going snap back tight like that. *snaps fingers for emphasis*. Missed YC last night. Loadsa people went for once. FML could only be that one night, right? Even Asian Danny, the faithful blog reader turned best friend turned boyfriend turned ex-boyfriend. I haven't seen him in ages, and I want to feel close to him again. In the first place, all he knew was me and I liked that. I'm an incredibly jealous person in the fact that I like people all for myself. When it's just me who knows someone, it's perfect. But when I tell my friend's about them, and they become better friends with them then I was.... dayum, that's a recipe for disaster. Disaster in my head, of course.


I need to stop fucking complaining to people. I've been doing it a lot lately. I don't know. My house went into the classifieds on Wednesday. Day after break up and fight and day where I had 3 tests and lost my home ec. Thanks, Big Kahuna. Was a great day; I didn't get to jog for the rest of the week... Wednesday, truly didn't feel like it. My legs were all knackered and I was knackered and sad so I sat down trying to drown myself in hot chocolate and marshmallows. And other stuff too. Reading Pride and Prejudice on my lonesome. Can you believe it took me three tries to type 'prejudice' right. I got that one in the first try. I knew blogs were educational. Cough cough from my sister. 08.22am. You'd think on a grounded weekend I'd lie in, but I woke up accidentally at 6 after a night of... thinking. My home ec teacher is worried about me. She took me out of class today when I forgot to go to lost & found the day before for my home-ec shit, and I went to find it that morning and it wasn't there... Turns out she had found it and she started rambling on about utter luniticisms of how I was pale and tired looking and scattered. I'm usually like that. Which made it all funny. I've been fighting with my parents a lot. And then there's the Junior Cert stress. Drama starts back up after school on Wednesdays. I can't wait... I love drama in our school.



Installing the new Messenger. Hope to god it's worth it. Internet is faaailing me. Hang on, no it isn't. Grr. I love cute little kitschy things. Like in Claires accessories, there's this adorable little Toad candy container. Toad from Super Mario, of course, not the ugly amphibian. I want to buy it but the effort of going all the way to Claires, I have no money, and am on brink of total lonerdom. *dramatic sigh*. Meap ftw. Phineas and Ferb. Comment.


LUCY XOXO

Break your face to match your grace...

Pain is just a simple compromise....


Things changeee so damn fast.
It's just teenagehood. I thought it was all good. And then POW. Lost two things in one night. Boyfriend and a close friend. Being honest, Keeva wasn't exactly what I'd describe as an amazing friend. She was there for me... but when she was, she told everyone what I had told her. And she bitched about her best friend everyday... That's just not right. I snapped last night... the year's worth of spite kinda flooded out on msn at her after the break up... it really didn't help that she found me being dumped frickin' hilarious. Or just the way it happened. CITT ruined my damn relationship. Me and Missa were playing around, asking could we tap all these random people and it got to Louis. I was like 'Can I tap that?'.. He asked if me and Missa were doing it to annoy him but we weren't and I was like 'I'm damn serious. I want your cock.' It's a goddamn joke, right? Well. Louis told Dave. Dave dumped me. I thought he was fucking kidding but.. he wasn't. :( And then I was shocked. And I cried for 7 hours non stop. No sleep. Lay crying with out checking the time, begging to stay home, but parentals refused and I rushed like fuck to school. I was scared when I went to school.. because I thought the others would hate me. But Ash doesn't. So it's all good. I love having best friends who I can fucking trust for once.. like Ash and Missa and shit. It's this sense of security like you're tied with elastic bands so if you fall, you'll spring right back up. Infallible rubber bands.... that'll never snap.




This was one of those frustrating short blogs. I was going to write more. But I'm in tears. Fail. Enjoy the pretty pics in this. I love pictures. Joining school photography club on Monday at lunch. In the BIG computer room.

LUCY XOXO

Comment to cheer me up. :(

Wake up early to black and white re-runs...

Run from them, from them... with no conviction...


(courtesy of Alicia Bock)


Do you know what?
When you go ahead and state the words 'It's All Perfect', everything starts tumbling down and there's that building sense that the big crash-into-a-cratrillion-pieces is coming. I don't know. I'm never happy with what I have anyway.. so when the truth dawned, I kinda expected it. It happened with two others in the past too. First impressions of something are often wrong. Always wrong. And now it's only me to blame. I felt really bad a first. I faked it. Bear in mind that this was only one night. So then I went off on private talks and three of us are the same. By the end of the night, one was brave enough to have it stopped. Me and The Remaining didn't. I don't know what I'm going to do. I have a strict rule that I have to give them at least 2 weeks. And it's been 6 days. I'm sorry for being so... cryptic. But people read this, and like.... grrr. I don't know, I don't know, I DON'T KNOW!


So. Hrm. Well, that's not the only thing that has escaped the tight knit. There's period. Period was put down in the last post. I can only assume that you people caught that it was a codename of some sort. Another cryptic thing. Friends come and go... We don't know what we're going to do. I'm backstabbing, I'm whiney, pathetic, moaney and a psychotic bitch; But I damn well admit it. I got ditched for those reasons. So... what's going to happen to Period? We can't do that. I won't do that. I know how much it fucking hurt sitting at your birthday with 5 people you knew as acquaintances. Especially when the only people you really want there are the ones who blatantly despise you and have no discretion in it. I suppose Period does have another circle. She's like the intersection of the venn diagram. Contents of A are us four. Contents of B are her boyfriend's friends. If we decide to leave the universal set, all of B would hate us, but at least she has B? Sigh.


Yesterday. Got the highlights and my fringe trimmed. She fiddled my layers a little bit too. Picked out new glasses. They're gorgeous. Big, thick black frames, with white and black patterns along the sides. I adore them. We can collect them on Tuesday. I got new shoelaces from New Look for Men. 2 pairs, neon pink and luminous lellow. I put the lellow ones on my tartan converse. Total sex shoes much? At like 5.30, I went out. Anddd for aboot an hour, me and Missa made a third-wheel dance cus' Chris is at a wedding. Our dance basically consisted of thrashing, twirling and falling. More falling than the rest though. Teehee. Then me and Ashling went off to Londis and talked then came back, got Missa and Jem, went Tesco and then Merissa needed to pee. And she peed for a good hour or two. (:



Well, well, well.
I'mma go.
Pictures of our movie night later.
It was changed to all girls. Ash is over for the whole day.
ILY ASH.
LUCY XOXO



&& Paramore Album is incredibly indie-emo-cutesy. I adore it. Never expected it. It grew on me tonnes.
(COMMENT)

PERIOD.

Some people. Are such crypohites. Backstabbing. Check. Crypohite. Check. Vain. Check.


Hang on, let's do this right.
7 deadly sins, we can tick off each one for this one girl.
Heck, I'll give examples.

Lust; Damn. She is always going too far with boys. And then claiming to adore them. And then... drops 'em.

Gluttony; She over-indulges on everything that's trivial and goddamn.

Greed; She has money, but... she uses others. She likes to keep her own money and take others food in excess. Oh, and the people they fancy too.

Sloth; She hates exercise, effort or anything that requires more brain power than a chimpanzee. She could be a good guitar player... but, in her words, the effort.

Wrath; She portrays anger at everyone. Smush goes the bug on her windshield. And she finds revenge as sweet as honey.

Envy; If you have something, she'll want it. She won't back down until she does. And girls like her get what they want.

Pride; Of course, in her eyes every boy loves her, every girl wants to be her. And when everyones dressed to the nines, she's pushing for ten.



Someone save our souls...
Promise a proper post tomorrow. Needed to let it out.
(:

LUCY XOXO

Making pictures where the lines overlap....

Mes petits chous!
Thanks for all those wonderful, endearing comments.. *major sarcasm*. Except to Vic, of course, because she bloody gives a shit. I adore Vic. Favourite follower by far because she comments all the time. She comments like fuck. Heavens sake, she's half of the cbox in her own rights. Love towards Vic. Snap-claps and what not. Today, today, today. It was okay. I started the day with a free History period in the library. We weren't allowed do homework, so there went my plan to finish my business before Ms. Plunkett snapped and gave me a note. So I basically made doodles along the margin of my History textbook of Adolfo shooting himself. And then the swastika all over the border too. Smiley smiley happy times. Then we had Irish. Ms. McEnery is some Hitler Youth child reincarnated. She's all smiley and shit and then when she closes the door she's shouting as gaeilge. The exam paper workbook thingy is so fucking hard. I'm like... eh... Ceist B (i)... Hrrm.. Ahhmm.... I'll just write 'Mhadra, Bainne, Dearg'. Translation = Dog, Milk, Red. And then double Science which was so boring. I don't really give two shits about those damned reactive Alkali metals. I mean, jeeeesh. FFS, she didn't even let us do the fun explodey experiment that set off the fire alarm last year. Kabooooom. After that, I went home because of my lower discs and their pressure. In the receptionn... hrmm. I talked to Aoife and Sophie and Aisling. Sophie is nice to me. I think she used to hate me. She gets a bad rep. When they called my mummy dearest, she was at a funeral. I was like... dayum, Lucy, stupid hoe discs. She collected me after half an hour though. So yays.





Paramore ticky ticks came in the post today. I saw that familiar brown envelope thingy and I got all excited and WOOOO. 5 tickets to le grande Paramore et You Me At Six. Then I went on msn and talked to Missington and shite. And then I downloaded Paramore's Brand New Eyes. 'Tis truly a great album. I like it. It's more like All We Know Is Falling. I still prefer B-Sides and Rarities. The pre-released songs were the best on the album so my expectations were half crushed, but I still adore it for being good without being too good. If ya get my drift. Highlights tomorrowww. And new glasses frames. I'm getting these sexy large frames... black, rectangular, sorta like my current ones, the ones in zee pic. But they're like bigger and stronger. And yummy. I'll look like a kinky secretary. Oh yeah, spank me after the tea break. Put it in after the meeting with the associates.



I'mma go now then. And btw, to all you stupidddd people, the comment box is OVER THERE. The cbox. Just type into it. Go anonymous if you please anyway. Just make me feel listened to in some way. 45 followers and only 1 bothers to comment. Sigh.




LUCY XOXO

Happy times call for happy measures...

Fantaaastic posing greed...




Teehee. No proper blog in a while. No proper news either. Just typing. Tippy tap tap. Looking across at my reflection in my window. Yoga posed on my bed. Like some odd mousey buddha. Life is seemingly perfect at the moment. Boyfriended happily, as all my mates are. Matey mates are all matey matey. I've grown closer to them too. I kinda rebuilt the important shit that was lost during the fight thingy. Where they all hated me. God, never in my life had I felt so lonely. I'm so proud that it's all going well. I'm doing better in school, I kinda understand the maths, I'm gonna start back up at guitar. And maybe jogging and yoga. I'mma cut out some junk food too. Try and get my skin clear again. Do stuff to make my chest bigger. Like.. push ups... (?). Life train is leaaving zee station with me at the wheel. Are there steering wheels on trains...?

Being more rebellious alsso. Compared to how I used to be. I'm average person now compared to catholic school girl. Ahaha. Mommy said I could get a cartilage piercing done. So I'mma get it done. Not a scaffold, just a stud. And then another stud beside the original lobe one. Speaking of which, I'm going to have to shove an earring through the originals. Haven't worn earrings in months literally. I'm getting highlights done on Friday with a couple more layers. Wispy wispa. Happy sigh. Life's good. Recently, I've been floating and giddy and find myself sitting and thinking about nothing and it's lovely. 'Cus I know I'm going to get through this, losing the house, and all the crying my mother is doing and my dad not having a job. I know I can. And other than that, I'm fine. Smiley smiley.

We're doing Pride and Prejudice in school. So far it proves quite the read. I adore it. Jane Austen seems to write really well and I'm only 5 chapters into the book. I'll admit it, some of the language is confusing. It's based in regency England, I'm hardly expected to comprehend every damn word. The movie bored me profusely. Keira Knightley can't act, Colin Firth was hot but not Mr. Darcy. And Mr. Bingley... barf much. So the book is a pleasant surprise; Reading is too addictive for me. I might become a member of the library. I detest libraries. I much prefer having the books as proof for the future.... how I can mark them or underline shit I like. But it's a recession, and if I want to read, I gotsa read other peoples hand-me-downs.


Well, I'm stuck for topics. Happy Happy Happy. LUCY XOXO



COMMENT PLEASE.

Shhh.

Look at me being all footloose and fancy-free on the blog. This is going to be a short post because even if it is only 10pm, I'm grounded from my laptop and am sposed to be asleep. Everyone's all happy, because we're paired off nicely. Dave asked me out. Jonny asked Ash out. Only a matter of time before Jemmy's asked out. And then the two obvious couples of Kevva and Macer and Missa and Chris. It's all shiny. Something's gonna go wrong, its in the air. Shh. Heard a door slam. Comment.

Lucy
XOXO

Mixtapes and misendeavours...

Aha. Well now. We call this the act of mating.


Hello there, oh possibly faithful readers or randomers who don't know when to stop reading (?).
It'ssss about 8.08am as I type this. Which is quite early. The funny thing is I usually don't wake 'til 9. But last night I was up 'til around 2. And my brain was like 'Hey, guys, d'you know what'd crack me up?? If we woke her INSANELY early on a Saturday morning. Listen, and the best part is, for no apparent reason!' Grr to my brain. Selfish bastard of a brain. Ehrrrmmm... I was randomly reading my friend's blogs because I really do not have much of a life. And I skipped on to Jonny's where I found something I relate to. So, it's all like a big jigsaw that wasn't on purpose, just a coinkidink. At youth club, they were going around the circle asking names and what we like. Everybody did it. It was all ha ha ha. Fuuunnn. Then they got to me, I stated my name and was cut off by about 4 people shouting 'slut' or 'whore'. I guess the intelligent thing would be to laugh it off, and not let it hit my pride. Too late. I dunno. I really don't try to be a slut or a whore. The odd thing is the furthest I've gone with anyone was making out. I know so many people who've gone way further. It's the clothes I wear, I suppose. Revealing tops, to say the goddamn least. But it gets me attention. And I have an unhealthy, toxic obsession with attention. It's like my cocaine. You gotta remember that nobody likes an attention seeker. I need to stop being so goddamn easy about things. I thought that people would understand that I'm only young once, and it's fine for any one of us to slut around. I hate how people have matured too much. It was fine when 13 was the new 15. But now... 13 is the new 30. It's not fucking supposed to be like that. In 2005, 435'00 teenage pregnancies were reported in America. If you've ever watched an 80's sex ed. video, you'll recall that medical professionals considered sex a way of contraception only for a long time. That didn't explain the clitoris though, so it wasn't logic from the start. From age 15-19, nobody wants a fucking baby. Teens fuck like rabbits. Some blame the music of today. Even emo-indie-brit rock bands base songs around sex sex sex sex and more sex. Panic! At The Disco, Metro Station, Fall Out Boy. All have songs about hookers and underage sex. I love those bands, those songs, those messages. We're being thrown in at the deep end. I don't know how I should react. I crazy ranted. Ahhhh.

Yesterrdaay. Friday. Hrmph. Twsssh. We went outside. Shock horror. Ash, Jem and Keevs were going gaa so they bought silly string. I just tagged along like a sheep. Sheep don't tag. Oh my, it seems I've lost my ability to function sanely. Just downloaded Strawberry Avalanche by Owl City. How to people listen to that crap? It's like doorbells and dickheads. I'm such a procrastinator. It's 10.02 now. Holding laptop screen to make it work .


I'll write again soon.
Lucy. xoxo

Smile, they're all staring...

Success is having to worry
about every damn thing in the
world, except money...

-Johnny Cash





This is peculiar. It's a year since VicVic wrote her first blog and this is my 100th blog post. WOO. This symbolizes accomplishment for me. Most people consider accomplishment as something physical.. or a goal of some sort. This is an accomplishment for me because I a) managed to keep something intact for a long time and b) managed to let out my feelings without forcefully annoying people. Like how I underlined 'forcefully'? It's because this blog is incredibly annoying also but people can just trail their cursor riiighhhttt on up to the big red x in the corner which means they can piss off. It's the diet option. :)


I would like to kindly address the unkind commenters. Don't get me wrong, I love the commenters like Jemmy and Vic and Dani and Davey and Fionaaaa and all. But those little skanks that are too cowardly to put their goddamn name alongside their comments are just pesky. Not even annoying, just pesky. Because I don't get moved easily by people with stupid insights on how I am and how I live. My view on Sabrina.. okay, shouldn't have posted it online. But I do have a right to free speech and all. Sabrina is nowhere near fucking perfect, Mrs/Mr/It Smileyface Anonymous. Neither am I, neither are you, neither is anyone. Perfect is something we all strive for in vain, never reach it, and end up dejected because it's too far forward. Fuck off with your 'faggot' because if you bothered to read further than the first post you saw, you'd realize that I physically am a faggot. Boohoo, I like girls. Shock horror. Wouldn't be surprised if you homophobic plaster-cast excuses of human beings ended up being gay yourself. Fudge-packers or Rug-munchers. Lalalaaa. If I were you lonely, lifeless creature-type-things, I do this thing called 'Get A Life'... or maybe just 'Build A Bridge'. I don't have time for that type of inane shit. So be gone, moronic fuckfaces.


School, school, school; What can I say? Sucks hairy pussy. Third year is a mess already. I've gotten 3 notes on different sections as it is, and it's 3 weeks into term. The homework comes in these god forsaken tidal waves of mass learning and pointless questions. When in our future lives will we ever need Irish Poetry, Algebraic expressions, Microbiological information and the ability to blanket-stitch? Unless we're all planning on being Irish/Maths/Science/Home-Ec teachers or microbiologists or..... under-paid Indonesian workers. I'm being a journalist; No questions asked. I don't care how I get the job or where I get the job. I'm just getting the job. I'll go to the worst college there is if I have to. I'm just doing journalism. Full Stop. I'm pretty sure I have the qualities of a journalist. I'm certainly inquisitive, to say the least. I'd be a crap journalist. Now that I think of it. I should have a back-up. Brothel; Fuck duh. Or just a waitress. Pie engineer. I could totally engineer pie. It can't be that hard. Base, crust, chocolate-fudge ripple teamed with ripe, luscious raspberries, covered over with a thin top and sprinkled with icing sugar. Hot out of the oven and passed to a customer. Orgasm. Now I'm damn hungry. That reminded me of 'Waitress'. Ever see that movie? I liked that movie. T'was goooooord.


I would like to bear an apology for not posting over the past 3 days. I was grounded from my laptop. I swear to god, they ground me from it if I accidentally slam the door because the window was wide open or something. My mom once grounded me for dropping a piece of plastic on the floor of her car. Accidentally. And it wasn't dirty plastic or nothing, it was plastic from the front of a brand new Wii game. Grrrraawwrrr. Sigh. Gaa and youth club on Friday. Don't know which to go for. On one hand, the Gaa is sweaty & horrible accompanied by that utter shit dance-trance music that's so annoying. On the other hand, it's fun to be out with friends til late, pounding to strobe dancing and making out randomly to my heart's content. But I feel like I'd be betraying youth club and all, even in all it's boringosity. If I go youth club, I'll end up totes third-wheeling on Chrissa and Miss. And that would be crap. But if I go gaa, I'll have to shave my legs and put on fake tan, not to mention wear something incredulously short and 6 inch high heels. Decisions, decisions, decisions.



I'mma go check my online accys now. New Twitter terms of use, according to my email. I'll talk to yas later. Toodle-doo.

LUCY
XOXO

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